I’m calling BS

OK. Another day without FHF.

Listening to After Hours…

Farty interrupts the podcast to tell Frank the boss called. Heidi says, “Maybe we don’t have to come in tomorrow.”

I’m 99% sure this was a setup. Frosty, Heidi, and Frank are experts at communicating to the audience without saying too much. The show’s off the air, no one is posting on Facebook or Twitter – obviously something is up.

This is Frank and Heidi’s way of letting us know that something is, in fact, going on – and they can’t say what yet.

So here are the choices:

1. They’re fired.

2. They’re suspended.

And if they are suspended, they will be fired shortly.

FHF-less Thursday

So no Frosty, Heidi, and Frank today?

An unexplained, midweek absence in talk radio is NEVER a good sign.

No Facebook explanations from any of them?

BAD sign.

Lots of recent talk about job loss, breaking up, Frank and Heidi not working with Frosty anymore?

TERRIBLE sign.

I’ll keep my fingers crossed, but this is standard talk radio firing procedure.

Bad vibes.

Pink’s and Red Eye

This is one of my earliest Brian Whitman memories.

Brian was scheduled to fill in for Doug McIntyre after Mr. KABC’s show. Mr. KABC takes this call from Brian on the air…

Brian: Mr. KABC, I’m at Pink’s and I’d like to know what you want me to get you.
Mr. K: That’s nice of you, but nothing for me, thanks.
Brian: Nonono, I’d like to get you something.
Mr. K: Really, Brian. I’m fine, you don’t need to get me anything.
Brian: ………I, I, I, I’m going to get you something.

I know, it’s a nothing story, really. But it’s momentous because here are two of my favorite radio personalities of all time on the actual, real radio like it’s nothing. Like talk radio isn’t about to collapse.

In the years that follow, Mr. K will be forced out of KABC and fired (OK, “not resigned”) at KTLK, Brian Whitman will leave KABC and get fired from KLSX, and Doug McIntyre will get fired from KABC.

Depression city.

But, hey, things are looking up for these studs.

Doug McIntyre’s Red Eye Radio is back on KABC nightly in Los Angeles.
Mr. K (Marc Germain) is back on KABC as the weekend Red Eye Radio host.
Brian Whitman is back with his own podcast – A Very Special Brian Whitman podcast – on Hot Talk LA.

Happy.

Wait…I’m the brand new Calvin Coolidge???

What would it take for a sophisticated, intelligent, fascinating, talented blogger to Google Calvin Coolidge quotes at 9:05 on a Sunday night?

No, it’s OK, you can say it. A sophisticated, intelligent, fascinating, talented blogger would certainly NOT Google Calvin Coolidge quotes. At any time. EVER.

So I’m not sure what it says about me that I’m doing just that. (Don’t tell me – I’m fragile.)

I read in a book* that a woman once seated next to Coolidge at a dinner party made a bet that she could get him to say more than two words. “You lose,” he told her.

While this story is quite possibly an urban legend, the following conversation is completely non-urban legendary (is that the term?). What I mean is…it’s depressingly true.

“Ms. Saunders?” (that’s me)

“Yes?”

“You’re a woman of few words, aren’t you?”

“Uh…I guess.”

Why am I telling this embarrassing story about myself? I don’t know. But I DO know that this week’s This American Life is about true urban legends. (How’s that for a segue?)

And, seriously…if you haven’t fallen head-over-heels in love with every inch of that show yet, it’s about damn time you did.

OK…well…keep cool!**

*I know it’s a book for children. That doesn’t mean it’s not good.

**That’s a joke for my super nerdy readers. I <3 u.

Diary of a Nerdy Kid

Tonight as I put my 10-year old son to bed, he grabbed his globe, sat down on the bed and – ever the teacher – explained to me why volcanic ash is blanketing Europe.

Him: I heard on CNN Student News that there’s a wind that’s moving the ash like this over Europe.

Me: Did you see that at school?

Him: No…I heard it on the CNN Student News podcast! (duh)

One of my proudest accomplishments as a parent is instilling in my child a love of podcasts.

So…after he went to bed, I stole his iPod. (Shhhh…)

Here’s a list of his podcast subscriptions:

Ask an Astronomer

CNN Student News

ESOcast

Fetch! with Ruff Ruffman

Hubblecast

Leo Laporte the Tech Guy

MacBreak Weekly

NASA Blueshift

This Week in Google

Nerd alert!

So…like…I’m reading this book

Hey – guess what! Did you know that people write books that are NOT about Tudor England?!?

Just kidding. I totally read other things. Seriously. Like important blogs. And Facebook status updates. (That counts as reading, right?) And…I love epistolary books.

So anyway, while I’m saving the remaining 12% of my book for later (thanks, Kindle, for the specific stats)…

From Jennifer to Brian Whitman

12th April, 2010

Dear Brian,

A very special podcast indeed!

Love always,

Jennifer

From Jennifer to Tod Perry

13th April, 2010

Dear Tod,

So sad to learn of your departure from Low Budget. You always made me laugh out loud – not in an LOL way – but actually laugh. Out loud. I’ll never hear a conspiracy theory or meet a whale without thinking of you.

Best of luck,

Jennifer

From Jennifer to Ira Glass

14th April, 2010

Dear Mr. Glass,

You are simply amazing.

Affectionately,

Jennifer

iVoyeur

You know how when you take a walk and it’s that time of day when your neighbors have turned the lights on inside but they haven’t closed the blinds yet and you can see inside their living rooms? And you totally accidentally-on-purpose spend a little too much time looking?

What are they watching on TV? Have they remodeled? Do they have piles of books and magazines and newspapers and empty coffee cups cluttering their table? (Stop looking in my house!)

Lately I’ve been thinking about how our electronic devices can betray us by revealing things about our psyches we don’t want everyone to know. Secret texts – obviously. Fake email accounts – check. But what about things like our Kindles and iPods?

Whenever someone asks to see my Kindle, I give a warning. “You can see it, but don’t look at the books I have on it and, if you do look at the books, don’t judge me based on them because these are just the books I READ. They’re not the books that define me. I mean, just because I have Twilight and The Six Wives of Henry VIII and Committed and The White Queen doesn’t mean those are, like, ME.”

(This is when I realize that I may be a tad self-conscious and that the guy at the Coffee Bean just wants to evaluate my Kindle on a technological level and not evaluate me on a psychological level.)

So before any of you wrestles my iPod away from me, I’ll pre-emptively expose to you my iTunes podcast library. If you promise not to judge me. (Hey, you can’t expect me to change that much in a day!)

And please don’t ask me about my Top 25 Most Played songs.